can Satan really be your daddy?

My friend and fellow Satanist Sean at The Daily Satanist recently did a post about his experience and views on the different types of Satanism he has met. Beyond the distinction between atheistic and theistic, there are quite a few other divergences, especially among theists.

One of the distinctions is in the relationship to Satan. For some he is a paternalistic father figure. For some he is a Master to be pleased. For some he is the real Creator God. For others he is an archetype, and others still a being, a god in the polytheistic sense; either a god among gods, or the head of an effective pantheon of demons.

I myself fall into the polytheistic camp, but what of the other approaches? I think Satan as archetype is well dealt with just about everywhere, as it is compatible with the most well publicised, atheistic forms of Satanism.

Satan as Creator God has me a little bemused, because I just don’t deal with creator gods as such, not in the cosmic sense. Gods are beings, like us, but very different to us in important ways (wisdom, knowledge, power, longevity etc), and I really wouldn’t want a replacement Jehovah or Allah, even without the laws and dogma. That would end up as a Deism for me, which is fine, but not much to communicate with there.

Satan as Master to be pleased is way off for me personally, as one of the big distinctions between monotheism and polytheism for me is that monotheistic “Gods” seem to want your will and obedience (in return for?), while polytheistic deities want things like your love, energy, state of consciousness, offerings, orgasms, whatever, but it is a relationship and it goes both ways. Your life remains your own, though they can have a wild sense of humour, and an uncomfortably intense sense of the “shortest route” at times. But you are not their slave, unless you get off on that and they like your energy when you’re submissive, in which case, you got yourself a deal (and hint, you can ask for things).

Now Satan as paternalistic, protective daddy I find a charming idea, but it’s just down to what you really need for your growth, what fulfils you, and what doesn’t hold you back. If you need a daddy, you probably will get one at some point, but your self-actualisation needs will determine the nature of your relationship (from your end) I reckon. You’d be surprised what kind of entities actually are tender and nurturing (in their own way) to the right person, and it’s a completely individual thing. But this isn’t “Satan is our Father” in an almost Christian sense. It’s more like the unlikely adoptive father to the unlikely kid (while that need and opportunity is there), because it fits, though in any relationship with deities there will be more to it than you are aware of at first. And it may well be more a question of “ok, and who’s yer daddy!” when they want a bit more of you than you were aware you wanted yourself*. I don’t believe it’s remiss to talk of divine (or infernal) empathy here. There are special bonds between deities, spirits and humans, and they occur for reasons. Such a bond is a real blessing.

Because Spiritual Satanism has the characteristics of a personal religion, without being a religion as such (it is a spirituality with a personal religious practice), I wonder about Satanism as a religion. Something that shelters people, helps them to grow in the ordinary sense, deal with life and their weaknesses, and be, after a fashion “better people”. As a Left Hand Path practice, Satanism cannot be this (and I think we need to be clear on that), but that is not to say that Satanism cannot have a Left Hand Path core, and a practically nurturing and protective exoteric form, though I can see this could be tricky, and more like Heathenry or Voodoo than a mainstream faith. It is like the question of bringing up children in Satanism. I am adamant that a child cannot be a Satanist – it goes against everything that lies at the heart of Satanism for me, which is maturity, freedom, responsibility and self-actualisation. But Satanists have a culture, and Satanists have children, so what is the form of healthy child rearing for a Satanist parent? Is it humanist? Something similar to what Pagan parents do? These are interesting questions for me.

Satan can be all things to all people, but what he isn’t is one thing to everyone. Behind it all is a figure who is challenging, uplifting, ardent, clear, subtle and surprising, as much as the quiet, resonant, inner voice of the self is. Yet he is an other, like an ancient breeze, carrying a fragrance we haven’t quite forgotten.

* and lest it be unclear, I don’t mean “do this thing I am commanding you to do” out of the blue stuff. No “the Devil told me to do it” shit. You are your own person, and you take responsibility for everything, including your own compulsions.



  1. Satan, many faces, many names.

    In my life Attention Deficit Disorder means that the ability to be motivated and focussed is important to me, which heaviliy influences my philsosophy and spirituality. Satanists talk about the Black Flame, a force that is connected to the will, which is another way of referring to it as a source of passion and focus. In concrete terms dopamine and the Black Flame has the same meanings, to be able to focus my mind and have the passion or motivation to drive through my will to getting things done in my life against considerable opposition. Satan is to many Satanists an idea, rather than as an anthromorphic entity with a mind, it is a cup to me, a blazing source of my passion and focus, that helps me get up in the morning, drive through all the obstacles, get my tax returns in, and being bloody minded in achieving my goals. Satan is a cup of dopamine, that is to me the most precious commodity in the universe, the difference between me crashing into oblivion (through its lack or low levels) or flying as high as a noble dragon (when I have lots of dopamine.) My personal code has now evolved taking into account the ideas of the Sith:

    Peace is a lie, there is only passion;
    Through passion, I gain focus;
    Through focus, I gain power;
    Through power, I gain victory;
    Through victory, I am set free.

    Passion, focus, ADD, Black Flame, Satan, dopamine, fire, red, motion (in both body and mind) are all the same thing to me. The ADD makes my Satan and my Satanism very personal to me, nobody outside of ADD/ADHD would really understand that, which is whay Satanism is often a sacred thing personal to each individual.

    • Very nicely expressed SV. With me Satan seems to be a multifaceted being that brings insight, balance, space, calm, dignity. In fact I am strongly earth-fire in elemental characteristics, but have developed a lot of water, so that is potentially a turbulent combination. Satan seems quite airy to me in contrast, but a profound airiness, actually rather similar to how some describe Lucifer, though with other things adding different tones. In both our cases, “Satan” seems to bring a completeness and resolution which is very personal to ourselves.

  2. He’s a bit of “all of the above” for me. I haven’t had experience in a Christian mindset (whatever that is, there’s too many individual Christians for me to buy that there’s some One Way they all see things all of the sudden) to personally see Deity as Father in that light so much, and Master seems more of D/s thing for me. In a way, both fit that dynamic at times. Just not with him 99% of the time. He’s usually Lover, Teacher, and Friend. Sometimes he’s Daddy because sometimes I desperately need that.

    He’s been good for me in that regard. Too much of my life was spent trying to do the right thing™, only to be shat on, that I ended up depressed, suicidal, and with so much anxiety that I was housebound. I still have trouble with it, but it’s a part of my path.

    He’s been very kind to me, because he knows that’s the only way it’s gonna work. I have to be able to grow and change, and deal with some heavy shit on a day-to-day basis, and he must be my refuge from it. That’s our deal. I also rarely practice witchcraft anymore because it always causes problems.

    Most of what I’ve seen in LHP circles Is a lot of angry, nasty stuff that I don’t personally think results in much growth at all. It’s a stage to pass through, but I don’t tend to see it happening for people. I’m a survivor of some pretty horrific abuse as well, and I’m not interested in those personalities, either. I’m not able to bear with people like that for long, less because of some incurable “weakness,” and more because I don’t want to go to prison in an effort to protect myself. I’ve got my own anger to deal with, but it isn’t who I am. I wasn’t born with it.

    Is Lucifer a soft little puppy to me? Hell no! But he’s aware that he doesn’t need to bite me or bark at me to get me to do something. If he did that, I’d lapse into terrified depression and it’d be all over.

    He’s not so much the deist kind of creator god, for me at least, so much as where I feel I come from. I’m unaware of any specifics (I’ve not gotten that far with him, personally), but I feel like he’s got something to do with humanity directly. I just don’t know.

    Maybe my experiences are a bit different, but I don’t know that either. I’m more of a nun of Satan/Lucifer from a very theistic Satanic Nature-based LHP sort-of angle than… I don’t know, what I usually see. I like how Satanism is so diverse. Your blog is a great breath of fresh air.

    I think I left some things out or phrased things oddly, but I think I got my point across.

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